Hair yesterday….gone today ………
My hair has been coming out in clumps for days. My scalp is irritated and my
hair hurts. I have large patches of scalp showing. I am shedding everywhere and
I can not stand the tingling soreness any longer.
It is time!!
Tom shaved my
head for me, while I cried. Seems like it took forever to finish. I do not think
I will spend much time in front of the mirror for a few days. It does not look like me.
I am cold……………
Jan 23rd . was my second chemo. 4 days out now and I feel pretty
good. Tired and a little nauseous, but managable.
So today I will be grateful for the
little things....
And mindful of the fact that my hair will come back in about 6
months.
Going back to work will be hard!
I have to remind myself this is my GAME of SURVIVOR.
That I will be pushing myself beyond - what I think I can do.
That I will learn more about myself during this journey - than I ever imagined.
Also keeping in mind I WANT to Win this game and that sometimes it will get tough.
Kelly - Just remember...this is still you. It is just another phase. Maybe one you don't like but nothing about you has changed. We all still love you no matter what. Like you said, "this is (a) game of survivor". We know you can do it and we are with you the whole way.
ReplyDeleteAngela
Thank you Angela. I appreciate your words.
DeleteSometimes I wonder if any one is reading my blogs.
I feel very isolated, I can't go anywhere, see my friends, shop, etc. Too much exposure to the FLU and CRUDE going around, with my immune system down.
I so want to come to the Super Bowl party and see everyone. But I will not. Just can't risk it.
I feel your love and thank you for writing me.
K
I understand. I remember going through all this with my mom as she struggled each day to survive. It is worth it and I feel blessed that I have gotten more more day with her as each day goes on.
DeleteWe all love you and miss you. We know you would be there if at all possible. However, I know this is not the time to be around all of us "buggy" people. Right now your job is to take care of you so we can love you for one more day.
Love you.
Ange
Hey Sis, Stay strong your hair has never defined who you are. Your heart and soul has, and it has always been beautiful just like you will be with no hair. This passes faster than you can imagine right now. Do you realize it has already been almost 6 months since we were diagnosed? I know you hurt and I'm sad to say it will get worse. But as it does you will get stronger every day and you will find yourself with more courage every day. God said that he would never put more on us than we can bear. And I believe in that. Sis I know your heart and you will come through this as a warrior you will find strength you didn't know you had and it will always be there just when you need it most. If its not your white cell count that's keeping you in try to get outside as much as possible, take a walk, go for a boat ride anything that will let you see the wonders of this world and you will realize that we will have many more years to enjoy it all. It does change your perception of everything, you will see how much more each day means when your doing something you truly enjoy. But stay strong sis we love you and your in our prayers every day. You will come through with grace and strength.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your words Wayne. I know you understand, and I have been going outside and making limited trips here and there. I love nature!!
DeleteBut as you know I am a very social person. I feel restricted and stifled, because of my low immune system.
Maybe that's why we appreciate people reaching out to us during our treatment. Whether its by mail, phone, email or text. Just the outside world reaching in to us.... can mean so much.
I hope you are doing better everyday. I know you have a great support system. Keep in touch.
TIME TO LAUGH OUT LOUD AGAIN KELLY......
ReplyDeleteHUG HUG, KISS KISS, I LOVE YOU!
TOP TEN REASONS WHY I AM NOW JEALOUS THAT YOU ARE BALD AND WHY IT IS AWESOME.....
#10: Blonde jokes no longer apply to you.
#9: Increased aerodynamics. You will get there faster.
#8: You can finally drive your convertible to work. (no more 'wind-tunnel' hair-dos. And if you don't have one, tell Tom to buy you one!
#7: You've got a blank canvas for new tattoos. Permanent markers work, too. Can I color your head?
#6: You're now ready to audition for the Blue Man Group.
#5: Time to get a new driver's license...Hair Color: Invisible. (see how that one goes over with the cop the next time you're pulled over)
#4: Think of the money you'll save...no more hairdresser,
shampoo, hairspray, hair dye, etc.
#3: Everyone knows that bald people make better lovers. (and if they don't, perhaps it's time that you showed them)
#2: It distracts attention from your face. (alright, that was completely uncalled for because your face is beautiful)
And the #1 reason that chemo-induced baldness is awesome:
Bald = Sexy, Bald is beautiful. AND you wear it with such class.
I hope you are at least smiling!!!
Melissa
Thank you Melissa, I am Smiling!
DeleteAunt Kelly. I love you so much. I am praying for you. :) I know all we be ok. You're always beautiful. :) :)
ReplyDeleteLots of love , April
Hey Sis the lady I have that works part time for me said they gave her a shot of something each time she got her chemo to help her fight infections. She said the reason she got it was because she has small kids at home and knew she would be exposed to virus's and bacterial stuff. Have they talked to you about it? Also she just gloves up and a mask and goes pretty much every she wants to. But she is also on her last chemos maybe it gets better after the first few. I know I only had reactions for the first 4 chemo and no reactions to the last 4. And I think the least the Super Bowl party can do for you is to let Tom hook up the laptop and Skype your presence for the night. Lol. Anyway ask about the shot to help fight off virus. Ill try to get a name of it for you. Luv u Sis. Stay warrior strong. I know you can.
ReplyDelete