NEWEST HARD Decision!!

Nov. 13^th Had a horribly rough day yesterday. The pain meds constipated me to point I have never experienced. On a pain scale of 1-10 I was an 7 and 8. Almost ready to make a emergency room trip. Finally relieve was given and OMG was that RELIEF ….lol

It never felt so good to POOP.

Nov 15^th  Thinking about my mortality on my birthday. I find it very hard – impossible to celebrate today. I am sure a year from now I will be happy to celebrate another birthday…but today I am not in the best of mood. I am headed to 2 Doctors visits, meeting my Endrocrinologist

I think he will be the one who discusses the HIGH POWER cancer drugs they want me to take for years. 

You know before I was diagnosed.... I use to think I will have 20 or 30 more years with my family and friends, thinking ahead of the fun we would have, traveling, family gatherings, grandchildren, retirement and the alone times with my husband. NOW with the possible ramifications of my decisions - about what to do to my body – I really realize I may only have 5 or 10 years. 

I no longer feel assured of my length of time and whether I know how to make the right decision.

Nov. 16^th  I Saw my newest Doctor yesterday, an Endocrinologist. Our Son went with me for this discussion, as he has a wealth of nutrition and body knowledge. We discussed my treatment plan. 

I was grateful my Doctor was open to discussion for my desire to use any less offensive, natural paths available. That, I was not thrilled about putting any poisons into my body. And I too would listen with an open mind. Jace and I both liked him. We talked for over an hour. WE recorded the conversation, with Doctors approval, so we could and listen again and share with my husband. These are life changing decisions I am making - I want to have knowledge and talk with my family who are also informed of the different decisions to be made.

Some good news…some bad news.

Good news………….NO 5 years of Tamoxifen

Bad news………I still need chemo and Herceptin drug.

Good news……they are known to have saved lives.

So now I have to decide to take my chances and do nothing. Improving my lifestyle in hopes of fending off another occurrence  

OR

take the poisons raising my chances by a small percentage for fending off another occurrence? And focus on rebuilding the damage done by the chemo and possible issues to my heart from Herceptin?

It is such a hard decision for me….

( Disclaimer) The things I am saying are my feelings and my opinions only. I am not telling anyone to make the same decisions. Every woman has to have a personalized plan with her Doctor and HAS to make her own decisions about what to put in her body.

What I am encouraging .....is that for anyone going through this…that you ask questions, lots of questions to everyone you can find. Reach out early before you start making choices and before surgery so that your choices are informed decisions, not ones made in hast. And Read on the trusted cancer websites…..Explore all your possibilities, even if you think you would not choose that path.   

 I changed my mind about my treatment, several times because of new information that came to me through discussions with other cancer survivors.